A Mother's Letter

Emily sent this as an email she got, I Love it and want to remember it, so therefore here it is! Hope you enjoy it too, Thanks,Em.

"This is a letter one mother wrote to her best friend on becoming a mother. This pretty much sums it up as much as possible. Happy Mother's Day to all the new moms!! (and to all moms!)

I have been trying for weeks to write a few words that would give you some idea of what to expect after your baby is born. Ive discovered that I need more than a few words. Motherhood, especially first-time motherhood, is so big and all-consuming that its hard to describe without resorting to clichés. A baby changes everything. Its the hardest job youll ever love. Kids grow up so fast. All true, but all inadequate to describe the experience of mothering a child.

The clichés only capture the big picture. To really understand the transformation from woman to mother, you have to experience the little details. You have to feel the weight of a new baby on your chest; marvel at how perfectly his little head fits into the hollow of your neck and how his little body is just the right size for the crook of your arm. You have to stare into his eyes; listen to him breathe; smell the top of his head; and feel his hand gripped tightly around your finger.

You also have to nap, around the clock, rather than sleep, for an entire year. You have to cry in despair when he cries for no apparent reason, and yell in frustration when it takes 30 minutes to get out of the house.

Your capacity to love this baby will amaze and overwhelm you. You will be so over-the-moon in love with your little man that you will call him Doodle or some other silly name, decorate your office with his pictures and brag about him to anyone who will listen. You will be obnoxious, and know that you are being obnoxious, and not care.

This motherly love is a solid, unshakable, hard-working kind of love. It will get you out of a warm bed at 3:00 in the morning. It will give you the patience and fortitude to spend hours constructing a 2-foot tall Lego pirate ship late on Christmas Eve. It will make you immune to all sorts of bodily fluids. You will be peed on, pooped on, a nd spit-up on, and not think twice about it. Late one night, youll hear an unfamiliar noise coming from the nursery and go in to find your little man throwing up all over himself. You will run to the crib, pull him in close so he wont be afraid, and let him throw up all over you. Mommys here, sweetie. Its okay. Mommys here.

As much as a mothers love is of the here-and-now, its also so much bigger than that. Its a spiritual, life-affirming, time-warping kind of love. A baby is the closest thing to God on Earth. Your baby will give you hope; he will restore you. He will make you feel like a kid again and let you see the world with a childs innocence and wonder.

This baby will make you feel young and alive, but his presence also will make you keenly aware of your own mortality and just how fragile life and happiness truly are. One day, you will be driving home after a long afternoon in the sun, singing The Kookaburra Song for the 62nd time that day, and you wi ll look over your shoulder to find your entire world asleep in the backseat. You will want time to stand still. But it doesnt. Time passes quickly when viewed through the eyes of motherhood. One day, your baby is sleeping in a bassinet in your room; the next day hes in the top bunk; and the next day youre sitting on his empty bed crying, hoping that he is safe and happy on his first night away at college.

You see, kids really do grow up fast. This baby really will change everything. It really is the hardest job youll ever love. You will work harder to succeed at this job than at any other. More than anything, you will want to do right by him, but on many days, you will fear that you have let him down. For those days, here is my one piece of advice: Do the best you can. Thats all a mother can do. And when your best feels woefully inadequate, talk to another mom. Motherhood is a sisterhood. Whatever youre feeling lonely, lost, overwhelmed, just plain tired weve all been there. We know the sacrifices youre making. We all get frustrated. We all raise our voice. Weve all sat down on the floor and cried. Talk to us.

I could go on and on, but it all boils down to one universal truth: Your child is born, and from that day forward, youre a mother first; everything is filtered through that perspective. It is a cataclysmic shift in priorities. If your child is happy and healthy, then all is right with the world. Deadlines, clients, politics, global warming it all stacks up somewhere below the well being of your child, the little man who will change everything."